Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Met Ball 2012 - THE GOOD!

My dear readers, I know it's become New Agey around here lately with all of the things you should know before you're 30 and how to open your heart up to love. But I know what you what. I know what you need. You need FASHION. You need GLAMOUR. You need the freakin MET BALL RED CARPET RUNDOWN. Now, for those of you just joining us, the Met Ball is an enormously important gala celebrating the opening of the Met's latest fashion exhibit and it is the best bet for fashion failure. You see, there are designers and models and editors and starlets and stylists and all of the models and starlets want the designers and editors and stylists to look at them and say HER! I MUST HAVE HER IN MY GOWN/PAGES/ROLODEX. And sometimes in hopes attracting attention they just look atrocious. Sometimes they look amazing. Either way, it's wonderful.

There are just far too many looks to get through in one day, so we'll just do the Good today. Enjoy!


Kristen Wiig!
We're starting off strong by taking Wiig off probation! Congratulations, Kristen: that was the shortest probation this blog has ever seen! Is this a bit twee? Yes. Is it a bit Betty Draper? Definitely. Is it like a million times better than she's done in the past, like ever? OH MY GOD YES. Good job, lady. You look great! (Oh, and dear readers, hold on to you tangerines because there is a lot of orange on the RC this time around.)

Nina Dobrev!
I have absolutely no idea who this person is but she is absolutely killing this look. She's gorgeous, the gown is gorgeous, the train is dramatic, and her hair is lovely. We'll get to Paula Patton in the background there...definitely not in this post. Oy.

I loooooooooove this color on her. Usually Solange is dressed up like 6 buckets of crazy but this is demure and fits like a dream. I'm even willing to forgive the lack of necklace because of her absolutely magnificent hair. Big sister Bey might be People's most beautiful woman right now, but in terms of Met Ball, Solange is the winning Knowles girl. (Seriously. Just WAIT until you see Beyonce. It's... holy god, the humanity. THE HUMANITY.)

Renee Zellweger!

Hands-down the best Ole Lemon Face has looked in a long, long time. I think I might objectively hate this dress but I have to admit that she is wearing the hell out of it.

Katharine McPhee!
For real, if you asked me last night who would be the best dressed at the Met Ball, there is no way I would have included McPhee, Lemon Face, and Solange on my list. But here we are. It's a new world. A world of apparently the brightest flash of all time and McPhee STILL looks stunning. The dress is phenomenal and I applaud her for not having scary boobage.

Lea Michele!

I mean, it's a shiny, tight dress in navy blue and that's what Lea Michele does all the time, but she is doing it oh so well. I dig this necklace. And I looooooooooooove that she has both The Sev and Donatella Versace behind her. This picture is gold.

Hilary Swank!
I love the construction on this dress, even if it does make her boobs go a little football shaped. I also love that she's not showing us a) side boob, b) her entire back, or 3) her navel. In fact, I love that so much that I put her in the Good pile. Do we think that's her real hair? If yes, how can I make mine do that?

Jessica Alba!
Goddess. I don't generally love Our Little Orange Angel's creations, but this is a winner on her. And there he is! In the background! Knowing how good this looks! I hope that Ms. Alba always wears this antique gold hue - it's gorgeous, gorgeous, gorgeous with her skin tone.

Kirsten Bell!

I cannot believe she was able to pull off an orange dress so well. This is making me rethink my embargo on buying orange clothes. Beautiful dress, good makeup, love the clutch. Hair is Meh.

Dianna Agron!

Girlfriend knows what works! Soft, green, and ethereal is the winner every time for Dianna. PS, that gigantic bow in the back? It's Christina Ricci. It gets worse.

Yes. Worse even than last year's ode to Kiss of the Spider Woman.

Jessica Pare!
Perfection. This is a woman who knows about accentuating curves in all the right ways.

Ginnifer Goodwin!
Ginny tends toward the Bad or the Meh, but she really brought it last night. Again, orange executed perfectly. I loooooooooooooooooooooooove the neckline of this with her hair. Love. And the shoes are an unexpected, chic color choice . Welcome to the Good, darling.

Carey Mulligan!
Please, everyone, just go Google "Carey Mulligan, Met Ball 2012" and check out some close ups of this dress. It is absolutely a work of art and she is wearing the hell out of it. I love her hair, I covet her makeup design, and I cannot believe how awesome this dress looks on her. Shiny!

Karolina Kurkova!
Speaking of shiny....Hail! All hail! THIS is how you do the Met Ball, my dear readers. You get an absolutely show-stopping dress that fits you like a glove and then you wear a sequined turban. TURBAN. Yes! My jaw dropped about 7 inches when I saw this picture. Karolina Kurkova, you win the Met Ball!

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