Oscars 2014 Fashion Rundown: The Good!

Welcome to the 2014 Oscars: A Parade of Beige. Seriously, I don't know who told these stars that the world would end if they touched a jewel tone, but someone must have. Someone must have also dared the boys to wear white tuxes. That was not a great dare. Before we go on with the Good listings, I give you a woman who knows no category....

Liza Minnelli!

I ask you: what could be better than Liza is satin loungewear? Liza in satin loungewear with matching hair streak! Do I wish she had opted for a bra? Of course. But come on: Liza is a treasure. She defies category. I love her.

THE GOOD!

Olivia Wilde!

Pregnancy has been very kind to Olivia Wilde. She looks better in formal maternity wear than she's ever looked on the red carpet. This look is classic and effortless. Well done!

Jennifer Lawrence!

This might be a divisive choice, but I like it. I'm glad she went for something a little less poofy princess and I love this color on her. I'm not really sure how why she's wearing the necklace in a way that makes it look like it's trying to escape down her back, but whatever: she's wearing a necklace.

Michael B. Jordan!

Beautiful. This is one of my favorite tuxes of the night. The shoes are extremely fierce as well. And let's be real: Michael B. is just THE CUTEST. Where Wallace at? On the red carpet, looking amazing.

Bette Midler!

Bow. Down.  Bette is flawless and this dress is really cool. For the record, I was also desperately in love with the dress she performed in. I would wear either of them. So great, so beautiful. I'm okay with the lack of necklace (but only barely).

Glenn Close!

You may not be able to tell from this photo, but this dress looks GREAT on her, moves beautifully, and the fabric lends enough visual interest to really make it pop. I would have gone with a different lip color, but that's true for most of the women on the RC yesterday.

Kate Hudson!

My dear readers, I give you the definition of Hollywood Glamour. Dramatic, gorgeous, perfectly fit. Yes yes yes.

Gabourey Sidibe!

Love the color, love the interest at the waistline, love the styling. This dress looked even better on camera. Beautiful.

Sandra Bullock!

Okay, sure, Sandy sat down in the limo (for shame!) and it could use a necklace, but I am IN LOVE with this look on her. It's classic, beautiful color, and the hair on the opposite side from the draping detail is a nice touch.

Kristen Chenoweth!

Bringing the art deco realness! It fits her like a dream and she just looks like a gorgeous golden statue... hrmmm where do you think she got that idea? Also, I love her haircut. Adore.

Jennifer Garner!

While I am not actually in love with this dress, it is so so so much better than the purple ruffle of doom she wore last year that I cannot help but grade on a curve. The shoes are a little bridesmaid-y for me (I would be interested to see this with the shoes Naomi Watts wore), but overall she looks great and the dress just looked so awesome when she moved!

Amy Adams!

Hands down, this is the best fitting dress of the night. Yes, there's a little business suit flavor to it, but I have to be real with you: this is one of my favorite red carpet looks of all Amy Adams time. Those earrings, though, are a CRIME. They are hideous and should never have been part of this.

and finally, the best of the night will be no surprise to anyone...

Lupita Nyong'o!

I couldn't resist using the action shot. Lupita is like a real-life Disney princess. She is just so perfect and wonderful. While I have no problems at all with any of this, I maybe would have swapped the headband for a pendant. I also would have gone for a pinker lip color, but then again maybe it would have been a little tooooo princessy? You know what, who cares. She's perfection personified and, even better, she gave a beautiful speech. Thank you, Lupita! We love you!